Osama, Abu, and Ayman: al-CIA-Duh Telethon
Friday April 28th 2006, 10:54 pm

First it was Osama bin Laden, then Abu Musab al-Zarqawi, and now Ayman al-Zawahiri. In the span of a week, these three al-CIA-duh heavyweights (two from beyond the grave) have issued communiqués. “Al-Qaeda in Iraq alone has carried out 800 martyrdom operations in three years, besides the victories of the other mujahidin. And this is what has broken the back of America in Iraq,” al-Zawahiri, or somebody we are expected believe is al-Zawahiri, said in a videotape released this evening. Ayman al-Zawahiri made this latest tape—or somebody in the basement of the CIA building did—from the wilds of Pakistan, Afghanistan, or from his prison cell in Iran (on February 18, 2002, the Guardian reported al-Zawahiri was imprisoned in the Evin prison in Iran). Of course, the Iraqi resistance is responsible for breaking the back of the occupation, not al-CIA-duh, the spook league of patsies and useful idiots.

It is interesting to note this latest production “was first obtained by IntelCenter, a United States government contractor that does work for various intelligence agencies,” according to the New York Times. According to former Army intelligence analyst and consultant William M. Arkin, IntelCenter is one of many cottage industries that have “sprung up since the early 1990’s to feed at the counter-terrorism trough” and its “primary client base is comprised of military, law enforcement and intelligence agencies in the US and other allied countries around the world,” in other words the folks who have a vested interest in making sure al-Zawahiri and the half-wit al-Zarqawi—by way of magic trick and computer graphics—check in every so often and make absurd claims, stealing the thunder of the Iraqi resistance.

“American counterterrorism officials were aware of the video and analyzing it. One American official said it was part of Al Qaeda’s ongoing propaganda campaign to try to demonstrate that it remained relevant,” the New York Times concludes. No doubt these “counterterrorism officials” will give the video a stamp of approval, as they routinely do to most al-CIA-duh communications, even those demonstrated to be crude forgeries in short order. Naturally, “al-Qaeda” must remain “relevant” (i.e., take all the credit for the Iraqi resistance), otherwise the “long war” would soon peter and fizzle out. Osama and crew must remain front and center, lest the attention of the fickle and generally peace-loving American public turns elsewhere.

“Zawahri also called for the overthrow of Pakistani President Pervez Musharraf, who has survived several al Qaeda-inspired assassination attempts since allying himself with Washington. Pakistan has captured or killed hundreds of al Qaeda members,” reports the CIA’s favorite newspaper. Musharraf has long claimed to have “completely shattered” al-CIA-duh in Pakistan. But like a game of whack-a-mole, the head of “al-Qaeda” keeps cropping up. Moreover, there seems to be an “al-Qaeda” training camp within shouting distance of Musharraf’s Rawalpindi headquarters, according to Maulana Fazlur Rehman, a Pakistani politician and friend of the Taliban (another CIA and ISI created monster). “That’s a bit like having a terrorist training camp on the outskirts of Washington, D.C.,” mused Richard Clarke, the nine eleven opportunist. “It is a fact that the Musharraf regime was the biggest supporter of the Taliban, who harbored al-Qaeda, which was recruiting and training men for terrorism prior to 9/11,” Benazir Bhutto, daughter of former premier Zulfiqar Ali Bhutto, told the Asia Times in late 2004. Recruiting Musharraf to go after “al-Qaeda” is like recruiting a pimp to stamp out prostitution.

But never mind. Our rulers need these cardboard villains and it is brand recognition alone that drives the “long war” and its transparent propaganda effort. “In his last Internet message in March, Zawahri called for attacks on the West, urging similar strikes as those against New York, London and Madrid,” the Washington Post adds, attacks that have yet to occur. Of course, as time creeps forward, and the coming maelstrom aimed at Iran picks up steam, such attacks become more likely. Bush’s approval ratings are in the dumpster and with every passing day he looks more and more like Richard Nixon—although Nixon’s crimes were small time by way of comparison